As a result of the efforts of the Prophet Sheath (pbuh) some people began to believe in Allah. As the time passed they began to worship the statue of their prophet. They became polytheists, irreligious and faithless. They adopted indecent ways of life. Under such circumstances Allah sent the Prophet Idris (pbuh) for the reformation and guidance of those who had gone astray. The Holy Quran makes mention of him in the following Verse:
“Commemorate Idris in the Book, verily he was a man of truth and a Prophet and We raised him to a lofty station.” (Surah 19: Verse 56)
Preaching and Opposition
The Prophet Idris (peace be upon him) preached monotheism. He directed his people to abandon idol-worship. He emphasized them not to be captivated by the love of wealth and property. He advised them to abstain from drinking wine and other intoxicants. Only a few men paid heed to his teachings but majority of the people opposed him bitterly. The Prophet Idris (pbuh) did not lose heart and continued preaching with unshakeable constancy. He is appreciated for his firm faith and forbearance in the following Verses of the Holy Quran:
“All (Isma’il, Dhul-Kifl and Idris) were men of constancy and patience. We admitted them into Our mercy, for they were of the righteous ones.” (Surah 21: Verse 85-86)
Migration to Egypt
In spite of untiring efforts the Prophet Idris (peace be upon him) could not attain considerable success and felt disgusted with the indifferent attitude of the public. He was directed to migrate to Egypt and settle on the bank of the river Nile. He preached the religion of Allah among various tribes and admonished them to be good and civilized. Consequently he brought about a remarkable change in the moral and social life of the people.
The Learned Prophet
The Prophet Idris (pbuh) was born one hundred years after the death of Prophet Adam (peace be upon him). He was the first man who learnt to write. It is said that thirty portions of Allah’s sacred scriptures were revealed to him. He was the inventor of the science of astronomy and arithmetic.
Death Event
The Prophet Idris (pbuh) was taken alive to Heavens at the age of 365 years. Ibn Jarir relates in Rauzatul Ahbab that the Prophet Idris (peace be upon him) was the special friend of one of the angels of heaven. The angel took him up into the heavens and when they arrived in the fourth heaven, they met the Angel of Death. The angel questioned the Angel of Death how many years there were remaining of the life of the Prophet Idris (pbuh). The Angel of Death said: Where is Idris because I have been commanded to end his life. The Prophet Idris (peace be upon him) then remained in the fourth heaven and he died in the wings of his angel friend who had taken him from earth. Mutwaslah was one of his distinguished sons who made his mark.
http://spreadislam.wordpress.com/prophet-idrispbuh/
The Night if Meraj (4th heaven):
Following this, we continued up to the fourth heaven. There I saw a person and asked Jibra'il, "Who is he?" He replied: "This is Idris, the one whom Allah the Great, brought up to a high station." I greeted him and prayed for his forgiveness; he too prayed for my forgiveness. In this heaven too there were Angels who like in the previous heavens gave me good tidings. I then saw another Angel who was leaning against a throne and had seventy thousand Angels under his command. In a loud voice, Jibra'il called out to him to stand - he obeyed and stood up and until the Day of Judgment, he will remain in that state."
From Bihar al-Anwar, Vol. 18, p. 325, Bab 3 - Ithbaat al-Mi`raaj wa ma`anaahu wa kayfiyyatuhu wa sifatuhu wa ma jaraa feehi wa wasf al-buraaq, Hadith 34.
http://www.al-islam.org/al-miraj/ Chapter 14
Prophet Idris in the Quran:
"And tell (Oh Muhammad) the story of Idris mentioned in the Book (Quran).Verily, he is the man who loves the truth and a Prophet , and We raised him to a high station . "
Surah Maryam (verse: 56-57)
"And ( remember ) Ismail ( Ishmael ) , Idris ( Enoch ) , and Dzulkifl ( Isaiah ) . All of them were from among the patient ones. And We admitted them to Our Mercy. Verily, they were off the righteous. "
Surah Al-Anbiya' (verse: 85-86)
http://www.helium.com/items/1387202-idris
Quick points:
- Prophet Idris (pbuh) was the 5th Generation of Prophet Adam (as).
- He was the 3rd prophet of Islam
- It is reported that he was the 1st to invent the basic form of writing.
http://islamickids.tripod.com/id108.htm
- He migrated to Egypt and settled along the banks of River Nile.
- He taught the people there, about fasting, charity and praying, also told
them not to drink wine.
- Majority of the people didn’t listen to him.
- He was the inventor of sciences of astronomy and arithmetic.
- He died at the age of 365 yrs
http://ourseeds.tripod.com/ProphetIdrisStory.html
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Salaam alaikum everyone,
So the long wedding discussion has ended. Lets take our minds to something else that we deal with on a personal level. And to make it all interesting, I've decided to start a teeny tiny activity. But that I will mention later. Lets see whats on our menu for the day shall we?
Shopping! Yes! I said it, it's whats constantly on our mind, it' whats become the purpose of life, purchasing something. I will now share an experience:
My monthly grocery shopping list was ready, And I couldn't wait to get on the go with it. It was one of my first few grocery buys since the wedding. I'm still in the learning and adapting stage. And college work, plus husband, and family takes up allot of my time, grocery shopping is a savior!
But this time I tried to put a twist to it, I cut 1/4th of my budget off. Why? Just to see if I was actually overspending, and prioritize better. There were times I stood with a product in hand and kept it back, because I didn't need it as much as I thought I did, then there were times, I made sure I checked out the prices of every other product to get the one that satisfied my budget (keep in in mind the quality desired). It took allot of time, but in the end I was more than satisfied spiritually than anything else.
It made me feel, I could conquer anything, I guess before my marriage I was an evil person in this regard, I bought whatever I wanted, even if I had to spend ALL of my allowance. But I now I've learned even the littlest of what you have is allot. And to some one your "nothing" is everything!.
Okay so now you must be thinking, grocery is different from that black shirt at Zara! I understand, but if you actually sit and think before you buy, and understand the concept of need and want, everything becomes so simple. And you might reach home with lesser shopping bags, but allot more money saved, and a great deal of pride.
So lets go further and analyse the problem, I've pondered over this more than a zillion times.
The question is; How/Why do we develop the want for something we don't need?
My school mate back in the day had explained this concept. We were all new into our selected streams, I had taken Humanities and she on the other hand, chose commerce. One of her subjects was entrepreneurship. And she was explaining the concept of "creating a need" in the market to sell a product. That conversation made me realize so many things, my brain started to hurt. It all came together for me, It's not like we don't know this concept, it's just easier to understand when put into simple words.
We all know we don't need 3 pairs of shoes. We don't require an outfit for everyday. We don't require 10 lipsticks of similar shades! etc. We just don't need them. There always comes a point in everyones life, where they have to think twice before buying something because of it's cost. No matter how rich, or how poor you are, there's always something you can't afford, which drives you to work harder and earn more to spend on these wants.
These wants are mostly worldly, How many times have we sacrificed a shopping trip to help a poor kid get education?, or buying a family a weeks food?. In Ramadan? Or when you want to take out sadaqah? Is that all the humanity left in us?.
Now think why did our prophet and the imams live with the least of things? What was their aim? do You think they did that for time pass? NO! They showed us that for survival with happiness you don't need "things", Every time you think you cant live without anything, or compare your or your hubbys or dads bank balance with that of others,realize you're creating a problem for yourself a worldly one! which is highly dangerous and dissatisfying. You can be more than happy and die with iman, you don't need these things!. The purpose of life is not to collect as many things as you can, but to grow as a Muslim and work for a good akhira.
lecturer Hajj Hassanain Rajabali mentions in a lecture to fantasize; fantasize about the heaven, fantasize about the life of beauty, suddenly you'll feel you everyday wants are petty. You'd feel like walking in rags, you'll feel like eating bread instead of a full meal. And unfortunately soon you may also get over this feeling, but work to stick to it. It's this feeling that'll humble us in our hearts and souls, which will make us stop judging and pressurizing people to do worldly things. Lets make an effort to live a life of constant remembrance of what's important. Whats worth the hard earned money and whats not. Whats a need and whats a want.
We are answerable to our expenditure. The concept of the satanic world is to get you busy with, wanting, then feeling you need it, then earning (no matter how, halal or haraam), then buying, then liking something else, becoming arrogant with your worldly gains, and then wanting more, leaving you no time to actually derive full pleasure out of your purchase. It's a cycle of nothingness. If you force yourself to enjoy what you have, you'll be deriving pleasure that are sacred, this will make you thank the one who blessed you with it, instead of getting busy trying to pursue another worldly buy.
I hope I've made my idea clear, And I have a little activity for you:
I want all of you to make list of your latest purchases, and select minimum 5 items you could've gone without. And send me the list, with an estimate on the total expenditure (in whatever currency). I'll be sharing all the lists with everyone (as examples) in the coming editions and bring some points into perspective. This will be good fun, and very personal to everyone, so that all of you can relate to it. And what my brainy brain will conclude will make you feel and think positive, Inshallah. (I am also joining in on this fun activity!).
Now, what are you waiting for work those memory cells and scribble down a list and send it. And I will not be sending another mail till I get at least 5 lists. You can ask your friends and have their lists sent too. No ones name will be revealed.
Blog readers can leave their list in the comments or just e-mail.
Waiting for some interesting replies.
Take care everyone, and be wise, don't get fooled by the satanic world! I know you're all smarter than that.
Fatima
PS: reply with lists to: syeda715@hotmail.com
__________________________________
Written by Syeda
So the long wedding discussion has ended. Lets take our minds to something else that we deal with on a personal level. And to make it all interesting, I've decided to start a teeny tiny activity. But that I will mention later. Lets see whats on our menu for the day shall we?
Shopping! Yes! I said it, it's whats constantly on our mind, it' whats become the purpose of life, purchasing something. I will now share an experience:
My monthly grocery shopping list was ready, And I couldn't wait to get on the go with it. It was one of my first few grocery buys since the wedding. I'm still in the learning and adapting stage. And college work, plus husband, and family takes up allot of my time, grocery shopping is a savior!
But this time I tried to put a twist to it, I cut 1/4th of my budget off. Why? Just to see if I was actually overspending, and prioritize better. There were times I stood with a product in hand and kept it back, because I didn't need it as much as I thought I did, then there were times, I made sure I checked out the prices of every other product to get the one that satisfied my budget (keep in in mind the quality desired). It took allot of time, but in the end I was more than satisfied spiritually than anything else.
It made me feel, I could conquer anything, I guess before my marriage I was an evil person in this regard, I bought whatever I wanted, even if I had to spend ALL of my allowance. But I now I've learned even the littlest of what you have is allot. And to some one your "nothing" is everything!.
Okay so now you must be thinking, grocery is different from that black shirt at Zara! I understand, but if you actually sit and think before you buy, and understand the concept of need and want, everything becomes so simple. And you might reach home with lesser shopping bags, but allot more money saved, and a great deal of pride.
So lets go further and analyse the problem, I've pondered over this more than a zillion times.
The question is; How/Why do we develop the want for something we don't need?
My school mate back in the day had explained this concept. We were all new into our selected streams, I had taken Humanities and she on the other hand, chose commerce. One of her subjects was entrepreneurship. And she was explaining the concept of "creating a need" in the market to sell a product. That conversation made me realize so many things, my brain started to hurt. It all came together for me, It's not like we don't know this concept, it's just easier to understand when put into simple words.
We all know we don't need 3 pairs of shoes. We don't require an outfit for everyday. We don't require 10 lipsticks of similar shades! etc. We just don't need them. There always comes a point in everyones life, where they have to think twice before buying something because of it's cost. No matter how rich, or how poor you are, there's always something you can't afford, which drives you to work harder and earn more to spend on these wants.
These wants are mostly worldly, How many times have we sacrificed a shopping trip to help a poor kid get education?, or buying a family a weeks food?. In Ramadan? Or when you want to take out sadaqah? Is that all the humanity left in us?.
Now think why did our prophet and the imams live with the least of things? What was their aim? do You think they did that for time pass? NO! They showed us that for survival with happiness you don't need "things", Every time you think you cant live without anything, or compare your or your hubbys or dads bank balance with that of others,realize you're creating a problem for yourself a worldly one! which is highly dangerous and dissatisfying. You can be more than happy and die with iman, you don't need these things!. The purpose of life is not to collect as many things as you can, but to grow as a Muslim and work for a good akhira.
lecturer Hajj Hassanain Rajabali mentions in a lecture to fantasize; fantasize about the heaven, fantasize about the life of beauty, suddenly you'll feel you everyday wants are petty. You'd feel like walking in rags, you'll feel like eating bread instead of a full meal. And unfortunately soon you may also get over this feeling, but work to stick to it. It's this feeling that'll humble us in our hearts and souls, which will make us stop judging and pressurizing people to do worldly things. Lets make an effort to live a life of constant remembrance of what's important. Whats worth the hard earned money and whats not. Whats a need and whats a want.
We are answerable to our expenditure. The concept of the satanic world is to get you busy with, wanting, then feeling you need it, then earning (no matter how, halal or haraam), then buying, then liking something else, becoming arrogant with your worldly gains, and then wanting more, leaving you no time to actually derive full pleasure out of your purchase. It's a cycle of nothingness. If you force yourself to enjoy what you have, you'll be deriving pleasure that are sacred, this will make you thank the one who blessed you with it, instead of getting busy trying to pursue another worldly buy.
I hope I've made my idea clear, And I have a little activity for you:
I want all of you to make list of your latest purchases, and select minimum 5 items you could've gone without. And send me the list, with an estimate on the total expenditure (in whatever currency). I'll be sharing all the lists with everyone (as examples) in the coming editions and bring some points into perspective. This will be good fun, and very personal to everyone, so that all of you can relate to it. And what my brainy brain will conclude will make you feel and think positive, Inshallah. (I am also joining in on this fun activity!).
Now, what are you waiting for work those memory cells and scribble down a list and send it. And I will not be sending another mail till I get at least 5 lists. You can ask your friends and have their lists sent too. No ones name will be revealed.
Blog readers can leave their list in the comments or just e-mail.
Waiting for some interesting replies.
Take care everyone, and be wise, don't get fooled by the satanic world! I know you're all smarter than that.
Fatima
PS: reply with lists to: syeda715@hotmail.com
__________________________________
Written by Syeda
Friday, November 13, 2009
Fatimas Life 2.6
Salaam alaikum,
So here we are, at the last step of the wedding drill.
Walima, is any dinner party. And the walima after the wedding is NOT from the grooms side but the groom. At least that's how it's supposed to be.
Back home, Walima are generally short and sweet. There are very few people invited, and the food is very simple. Sometimes there's no walima. And people don't mind that. It's the wish of the groom, and it's Mustahab NOT wajib. Most people here don't even know that.
One wedding, there was only ice cream served, because the groom could afford only that. It's such a humble way celebrating a new phase of life (which by the way was served in the day of the nikah itself). For some it's the reminder of the practicality of Islam, and for some it's against the societal norms. The latter ideology saddens me. Whats the point in taking loans and doing a lavish walima, for people who don't even care about you. Because in the end of the day, if your family people are indirectly pressurizing you for anything, they don't, or are just way to ignorant to be called adults.
We don't know how many grooms trying to live up to their societal status subscribe to loans. It's so unnecessary. No one in the end of the day cares about the stress you've undertaken, no one cares about how hard you've worked to earn, no one cares about other ideas and places of investment in your mind, no one cares about anything but themselves. This is the harsh truth, this is the depth of each wedding, that we surprisingly don't find out.
We don't take enough time out to think, and ponder over the issues in our society. The society we're responsible for. The families we are growing up in, the ones that are molding our thinking, shaping our souls into being who we are. We don't think about the effect of these social standards on the next generation. We are way too busy making ends meet, satisfying our worldly wants, etc. Our brain was made to not just excel academically, there is something no education system teaches us. There is no religion that stresses on thinking as much as Islam. Because it's a religion of confidence, which wants you to dream, fantasize, think, work those brains to understand the depths each law, each part of the religion. And I know with practice that; it's not something you need to set a timetable for. Seriously, trust me. Think when you're speaking to someone, assess their words, think while listening to a lecture, think when you watch TV, what is it that is being processed into your head. Why are the things around you the way they are?. And marriage is a big part of our society that deserves allot of thought, AND practical application.
Here are few questions you should have answers to:
1. What importance does marriage hold in Islam?
2. What are the wajibaat in a wedding?
3. What is the aim of every tradition, included in the procedure of wedding?
4. How is the selection of groom and bride done?
5. How is the whole lengthy procedure helpful to everyone attending Islamically?
6. In what way is marriage helpful to individuals?
7. Am I as an attendee able to go through a wedding without compromising my religious duties?
8. Am I thinking enough and giving this issue due importance?
Those are just few, ask more, and you'd grow as an intellectual human being. And always keep in mind the big picture. I just can't help stress enough on it. Our responsibilities in this world and duties towards Allah is our goal in life, and that should be the basis of our decision making. Qurbatan Illallah (for the pleasure of Allah) That's our motto!
And don't think paying attention to this issue is not applicable in your situation because you're no where near the wedding phase of life. You will regret not having thought about it after committing mistakes. Should try putting yourselves in shoes of others and constantly try thinking beyond your maturity level. It will make life and lifes Jihad easy for you. There is no excuse to avoid empathizing. Whats the point in realizing things late when they the damage is done?.
This marks the end of the wedding series. And I have a fun activity coming up in my next post. I hope you're all interested in something interactive!. So stay tuned. and keep mailing me. I love to know about what you think.
Take care
KH
Fatima
So here we are, at the last step of the wedding drill.
Walima, is any dinner party. And the walima after the wedding is NOT from the grooms side but the groom. At least that's how it's supposed to be.
Back home, Walima are generally short and sweet. There are very few people invited, and the food is very simple. Sometimes there's no walima. And people don't mind that. It's the wish of the groom, and it's Mustahab NOT wajib. Most people here don't even know that.
One wedding, there was only ice cream served, because the groom could afford only that. It's such a humble way celebrating a new phase of life (which by the way was served in the day of the nikah itself). For some it's the reminder of the practicality of Islam, and for some it's against the societal norms. The latter ideology saddens me. Whats the point in taking loans and doing a lavish walima, for people who don't even care about you. Because in the end of the day, if your family people are indirectly pressurizing you for anything, they don't, or are just way to ignorant to be called adults.
We don't know how many grooms trying to live up to their societal status subscribe to loans. It's so unnecessary. No one in the end of the day cares about the stress you've undertaken, no one cares about how hard you've worked to earn, no one cares about other ideas and places of investment in your mind, no one cares about anything but themselves. This is the harsh truth, this is the depth of each wedding, that we surprisingly don't find out.
We don't take enough time out to think, and ponder over the issues in our society. The society we're responsible for. The families we are growing up in, the ones that are molding our thinking, shaping our souls into being who we are. We don't think about the effect of these social standards on the next generation. We are way too busy making ends meet, satisfying our worldly wants, etc. Our brain was made to not just excel academically, there is something no education system teaches us. There is no religion that stresses on thinking as much as Islam. Because it's a religion of confidence, which wants you to dream, fantasize, think, work those brains to understand the depths each law, each part of the religion. And I know with practice that; it's not something you need to set a timetable for. Seriously, trust me. Think when you're speaking to someone, assess their words, think while listening to a lecture, think when you watch TV, what is it that is being processed into your head. Why are the things around you the way they are?. And marriage is a big part of our society that deserves allot of thought, AND practical application.
Here are few questions you should have answers to:
1. What importance does marriage hold in Islam?
2. What are the wajibaat in a wedding?
3. What is the aim of every tradition, included in the procedure of wedding?
4. How is the selection of groom and bride done?
5. How is the whole lengthy procedure helpful to everyone attending Islamically?
6. In what way is marriage helpful to individuals?
7. Am I as an attendee able to go through a wedding without compromising my religious duties?
8. Am I thinking enough and giving this issue due importance?
Those are just few, ask more, and you'd grow as an intellectual human being. And always keep in mind the big picture. I just can't help stress enough on it. Our responsibilities in this world and duties towards Allah is our goal in life, and that should be the basis of our decision making. Qurbatan Illallah (for the pleasure of Allah) That's our motto!
And don't think paying attention to this issue is not applicable in your situation because you're no where near the wedding phase of life. You will regret not having thought about it after committing mistakes. Should try putting yourselves in shoes of others and constantly try thinking beyond your maturity level. It will make life and lifes Jihad easy for you. There is no excuse to avoid empathizing. Whats the point in realizing things late when they the damage is done?.
This marks the end of the wedding series. And I have a fun activity coming up in my next post. I hope you're all interested in something interactive!. So stay tuned. and keep mailing me. I love to know about what you think.
Take care
KH
Fatima
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Fatimas life 2.5
Salaam alaikum,
Today is the chohti. Which traditionally is supposed to be the day after the wedding. The groom along with immediate family comes to pick the bride up from her home (She left in the afternoon, to come to her parents place).
It's a tradition that the bride return home, the next day. It's totally illogical, in fact I personally find it very embarrassing. For a bride it's the day after she's actually had a 360 degree spin with life. Plus everyone knows now she's entered a whole different phase of life etc. To go and show your face to the whole world and announce it all, it's just embarrassing. I hope you are reading between the lines.
So anyway, this chohti dinner is supposed to be for those who pick her up, because out of manners how can you leave the grooms family to come home and not serve them food etc. basically for hospitality purposes.
But what has it become now? It's a whole dinner party all together. close extended family is also called, and the whole scene becomes a big deal. Forget about who's coming to pick the girl up, here people are invited!. It's totally blown out of proportion. Do we really have so much time to spare? then why not listen to a good lecture?, why not do research on a particular topic you've been confused about?, why not spend quality time with your family?, why not pray some sunnah prayers?. Nah! we don't need them, attending and hosting such parties is more important. It's not like if these things were avoided, you're showing no love to your family. As it is we have enough eids to meet up, and celebrate. Why add more?.
Notice: I can't help but bring a crucial observation to notice here. The women, AND men, who participate in these functions, and attend or host them, take allot of time and effort to getting ready. Yet, when it's eid, they're dressed like they couldn't care less. All the non-hijabi clothes are booked for weddings, and all the glossy makeup, and matching ties, and shoes are saved up for these petty functions. And when it's eid, they think twice to get something new, or take that much effort to get ready. Why? I won't answer that. Be truthful to yourself and ask your self.
Have worldly parties become our scale to measure where to make an extra effort?
Getting back, nothing exciting happens today, it's just the dinner and garland wearing ceremony. Mind you constant judging of the groom and brides clothes is going on, there are fashion police aunties at the party. They make a special effort in potentially having a girl wed, or screwing up her life. They judge the attenders of the party via their clothes. And then ruin their names behind their backs. If you're wearing sleeveless, you're gone, never to get married, because wearing half or even mega sleeves is great!. But NO sleeveless. Why? aren't they both haraam to be worn in front of na-mahrams?. This makes living in the society difficult. These, man made standards, which are different to each, these make or break your reputation. Why follow them? Don't we have Allah to follow? Don't we have His book?, His rules?, His granted freewill?. Or are you just choosing to ignore it?.
Fire crackers are a norm in these weddings, why not waste more money? cause pollution, and be smart. Won't get into detail about this. This particular topic, of wedding bands, and fire crackers is an open book. Just remember when you don't like something, stick to your opinion, and never support it no matter what.
Again just like any other function, hijab boundaries are broken, unnecessary convos take place, money's wasted, musics is played, enjoyment of every sort that is haraam is encourages (knowingly or unknowingly). And NOTHING productive happens.
Seriously, I think we should make it a point, to decide on making each day productive, not materialistically, but islamically. Something good should come out of our everyday activities. That way we'd gain clarity of what's useless to us and whats not. We are answerable to our time aren't we?
Hope there is something in this part that makes you think about your truthfulness to your creator and your responsibility towards Him.
This is Fatima signing off for the day. Last edition of the wedding series next, Walima!
take care
Fatima
Today is the chohti. Which traditionally is supposed to be the day after the wedding. The groom along with immediate family comes to pick the bride up from her home (She left in the afternoon, to come to her parents place).
It's a tradition that the bride return home, the next day. It's totally illogical, in fact I personally find it very embarrassing. For a bride it's the day after she's actually had a 360 degree spin with life. Plus everyone knows now she's entered a whole different phase of life etc. To go and show your face to the whole world and announce it all, it's just embarrassing. I hope you are reading between the lines.
So anyway, this chohti dinner is supposed to be for those who pick her up, because out of manners how can you leave the grooms family to come home and not serve them food etc. basically for hospitality purposes.
But what has it become now? It's a whole dinner party all together. close extended family is also called, and the whole scene becomes a big deal. Forget about who's coming to pick the girl up, here people are invited!. It's totally blown out of proportion. Do we really have so much time to spare? then why not listen to a good lecture?, why not do research on a particular topic you've been confused about?, why not spend quality time with your family?, why not pray some sunnah prayers?. Nah! we don't need them, attending and hosting such parties is more important. It's not like if these things were avoided, you're showing no love to your family. As it is we have enough eids to meet up, and celebrate. Why add more?.
Notice: I can't help but bring a crucial observation to notice here. The women, AND men, who participate in these functions, and attend or host them, take allot of time and effort to getting ready. Yet, when it's eid, they're dressed like they couldn't care less. All the non-hijabi clothes are booked for weddings, and all the glossy makeup, and matching ties, and shoes are saved up for these petty functions. And when it's eid, they think twice to get something new, or take that much effort to get ready. Why? I won't answer that. Be truthful to yourself and ask your self.
Have worldly parties become our scale to measure where to make an extra effort?
Getting back, nothing exciting happens today, it's just the dinner and garland wearing ceremony. Mind you constant judging of the groom and brides clothes is going on, there are fashion police aunties at the party. They make a special effort in potentially having a girl wed, or screwing up her life. They judge the attenders of the party via their clothes. And then ruin their names behind their backs. If you're wearing sleeveless, you're gone, never to get married, because wearing half or even mega sleeves is great!. But NO sleeveless. Why? aren't they both haraam to be worn in front of na-mahrams?. This makes living in the society difficult. These, man made standards, which are different to each, these make or break your reputation. Why follow them? Don't we have Allah to follow? Don't we have His book?, His rules?, His granted freewill?. Or are you just choosing to ignore it?.
Fire crackers are a norm in these weddings, why not waste more money? cause pollution, and be smart. Won't get into detail about this. This particular topic, of wedding bands, and fire crackers is an open book. Just remember when you don't like something, stick to your opinion, and never support it no matter what.
Again just like any other function, hijab boundaries are broken, unnecessary convos take place, money's wasted, musics is played, enjoyment of every sort that is haraam is encourages (knowingly or unknowingly). And NOTHING productive happens.
Seriously, I think we should make it a point, to decide on making each day productive, not materialistically, but islamically. Something good should come out of our everyday activities. That way we'd gain clarity of what's useless to us and whats not. We are answerable to our time aren't we?
Hope there is something in this part that makes you think about your truthfulness to your creator and your responsibility towards Him.
This is Fatima signing off for the day. Last edition of the wedding series next, Walima!
take care
Fatima
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Fatimas life 2.4
Salaam alaikum,
yes it's finally the BIG day. And trust me I was more excited to know what would happen just so I could share my experience with all of you!
Lets get going now shall we.....
So I'm here, surrounded by ladies with saris of various fabrics, chiffon, georgette, lace, net, yes ! I said it net!!, and the younger girls, (who strangely, aren't allowed to wear saris before their marriage), are all beautifully clad in shararas, and chudidaars, and peshwaas' etc. It was a whole glamorous scene.
And while I'm staring at this beauty I hear the loud salawaat, the bride has arrived! all the close sisters rush to the bride to welcome her in, everyones eyes are set on the aisle, to at a glance make 10thousand judgments, and also admire her. Beautiful in her red khada dupatta, she walks slowly as her video is being taken and flashes of cameras hit her face blinding her.
Hmm, reminds me of mine...anyway, she's then seated on the stage. Everything is great, everything is smooth, till.......some random brother from the grooms side walks in (thank god I'm in hijab), but what about the others?. No one cares, no one even notices this testosterone!. No wonder a sweet sister had warned me about this, the segregation of men and women is almost name sake.
So anyway, it wasn't just him, some other men also came in every now and then for god knows what reason. And all the ladies are enjoying themselves laughing out loud, in front of the camera guy, the brides make up is getting touches before her photo shoot starts. Wherein the camera guy gives her rather weird poses to make. Why would any one want to take orders from a random man?, to stand a certain way, to keep your leg in a certain angle, to move your hand, to put your ghoongat away from the face, etc. WHY?
I don't think I can ever get answers to these questions. I don't think I even want to. The camera guy's taking endless pictures, till his want, god knows what thoughts are running in his head reagrding this young, rather stupid girl. How do the fathers & mothers of the bride allow this?
Anyway, I've repeated the camera scene enough times for you to understand, it's dinner time. Dinner went smooth too, male waiters serving women, women bending forward to pick things up from the floor, or yelling and ordering for things, calling the waiters etc. Sari pallus slipping off, deep necked blouse....Wow how Islamic!.
After the dinner, allot of the extended family leaves. And only the close family stays back for the last few things like; family photographs, etc. Including some other quran reading, and viewing each other in the mirror thing, whose significance I'm not too sure of.
Lookie! namahrams coming, passing comments, joking around, teasing other sisters, the whole photograph session is a 1hr or so deal. And poor bride, having her feet sore, so tired ready since forever, is silently bearing through everything. She complaints to her sister, but the mom says she can't do anything she's some other familys now. So? Humanity gone? some brides I've known have even fainted in this long endless process.
some have had insane cramps, some have become weak ,and not eaten properly because of nervousness. Not to mention the emotional stress that's involved on such a day.
Immediate family is stressed too, with all the work, but also a little relieved that the day has come, the day for which they had been saving from her birth, just so they could live up to the expectations of the society, and give 3 varieties of chicken instead of 2, and so and so kg of gold, and 20 sets of clothing, the list goes on.....And it's sad to think. No wonder in the end of the day they don't have money or energy enough to save for her education, or even think about her career, or her emotional health while growing up.
Some families I've noticed, in fact most of them speak of marriage so much to their girls that they make them believe that getting hitched is the aim of their lives. Nothing else. When these girls have a bad ending, like a divorce, or death of a partner, or simply have a hard life. They end up feeling useless, and have suicidal thoughts. Why won't they? Some of these women don't even pursue their education, because their life plan is wedding (100% accepted by the society). I pose questions at this point. Where is this family, when she's in a situation of divorce?, who is searching or volunteering for marrying her?. Who is not making her feel like a burden. And if that poor lady has a kid! then her life is finished. No one will accept that baby, even though it's a halal one. Why? This is something beyond serious. It's is difficult to think differently for the girl, when all her life she's fed with weird ideologies, instead of the Islamic one.
somewhere down the line, we've all judged marriages that don't work. But have we helped a divorcee get married? have we helped her support her kid? have we counseled her? have we given double standards to male divorcee? have we volunteered to search for the prettiest girl for him? have we spoiled and disowned the woman who got divorced?. Many questions, many realizations, many emotions. Face them, and you'll grow as a Muslim, as a human being.
getting back!, she's gone, well gone, all have cried, soon this day would be a thought in her head to ponder over in between busy schedules, and kids....soon allot will change....soon....
Take care everyone......
walima coming up!
Fatima
____________________
Written by Syeda
yes it's finally the BIG day. And trust me I was more excited to know what would happen just so I could share my experience with all of you!
Lets get going now shall we.....
So I'm here, surrounded by ladies with saris of various fabrics, chiffon, georgette, lace, net, yes ! I said it net!!, and the younger girls, (who strangely, aren't allowed to wear saris before their marriage), are all beautifully clad in shararas, and chudidaars, and peshwaas' etc. It was a whole glamorous scene.
And while I'm staring at this beauty I hear the loud salawaat, the bride has arrived! all the close sisters rush to the bride to welcome her in, everyones eyes are set on the aisle, to at a glance make 10thousand judgments, and also admire her. Beautiful in her red khada dupatta, she walks slowly as her video is being taken and flashes of cameras hit her face blinding her.
Hmm, reminds me of mine...anyway, she's then seated on the stage. Everything is great, everything is smooth, till.......some random brother from the grooms side walks in (thank god I'm in hijab), but what about the others?. No one cares, no one even notices this testosterone!. No wonder a sweet sister had warned me about this, the segregation of men and women is almost name sake.
So anyway, it wasn't just him, some other men also came in every now and then for god knows what reason. And all the ladies are enjoying themselves laughing out loud, in front of the camera guy, the brides make up is getting touches before her photo shoot starts. Wherein the camera guy gives her rather weird poses to make. Why would any one want to take orders from a random man?, to stand a certain way, to keep your leg in a certain angle, to move your hand, to put your ghoongat away from the face, etc. WHY?
I don't think I can ever get answers to these questions. I don't think I even want to. The camera guy's taking endless pictures, till his want, god knows what thoughts are running in his head reagrding this young, rather stupid girl. How do the fathers & mothers of the bride allow this?
Anyway, I've repeated the camera scene enough times for you to understand, it's dinner time. Dinner went smooth too, male waiters serving women, women bending forward to pick things up from the floor, or yelling and ordering for things, calling the waiters etc. Sari pallus slipping off, deep necked blouse....Wow how Islamic!.
After the dinner, allot of the extended family leaves. And only the close family stays back for the last few things like; family photographs, etc. Including some other quran reading, and viewing each other in the mirror thing, whose significance I'm not too sure of.
Lookie! namahrams coming, passing comments, joking around, teasing other sisters, the whole photograph session is a 1hr or so deal. And poor bride, having her feet sore, so tired ready since forever, is silently bearing through everything. She complaints to her sister, but the mom says she can't do anything she's some other familys now. So? Humanity gone? some brides I've known have even fainted in this long endless process.
some have had insane cramps, some have become weak ,and not eaten properly because of nervousness. Not to mention the emotional stress that's involved on such a day.
Immediate family is stressed too, with all the work, but also a little relieved that the day has come, the day for which they had been saving from her birth, just so they could live up to the expectations of the society, and give 3 varieties of chicken instead of 2, and so and so kg of gold, and 20 sets of clothing, the list goes on.....And it's sad to think. No wonder in the end of the day they don't have money or energy enough to save for her education, or even think about her career, or her emotional health while growing up.
Some families I've noticed, in fact most of them speak of marriage so much to their girls that they make them believe that getting hitched is the aim of their lives. Nothing else. When these girls have a bad ending, like a divorce, or death of a partner, or simply have a hard life. They end up feeling useless, and have suicidal thoughts. Why won't they? Some of these women don't even pursue their education, because their life plan is wedding (100% accepted by the society). I pose questions at this point. Where is this family, when she's in a situation of divorce?, who is searching or volunteering for marrying her?. Who is not making her feel like a burden. And if that poor lady has a kid! then her life is finished. No one will accept that baby, even though it's a halal one. Why? This is something beyond serious. It's is difficult to think differently for the girl, when all her life she's fed with weird ideologies, instead of the Islamic one.
somewhere down the line, we've all judged marriages that don't work. But have we helped a divorcee get married? have we helped her support her kid? have we counseled her? have we given double standards to male divorcee? have we volunteered to search for the prettiest girl for him? have we spoiled and disowned the woman who got divorced?. Many questions, many realizations, many emotions. Face them, and you'll grow as a Muslim, as a human being.
getting back!, she's gone, well gone, all have cried, soon this day would be a thought in her head to ponder over in between busy schedules, and kids....soon allot will change....soon....
Take care everyone......
walima coming up!
Fatima
____________________
Written by Syeda
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Doing dawah?
Islam is the fastest growing religion in world today. And this is happening because of allot of reasons. One of them is dawah. The invitation and preaching of Islam to non-Muslims by Muslims. May Allah bless everyone who is guiding these people to the siraat al mustakeem.
I've been pondering over the concept of dawah, and realized that not everyone should do it. Especially when you're not aware of Islam as a whole. This is a very delicate topic that I'm touching, but equally important.
When the spirit of doing dawah ignites in your soul, ask yourself if you're 100% sure you're right. We all know that Islam will break into 73 sects and ONLY ONE will go to heaven. Meaning 72 sects of Islam are WRONG and will be going to hell. This is a very big thing.
What is my point?. If you are not aware, there are allot of differences between each sect. You might think 'the quran is the same, I can at least preach that' , You're very much wrong. Because there is a difference in translation and tafseer of quran in different sects. Even though the Quran is same, the translation differs. Now you can just imagine the issue of ahadith, and sunnah etc.
My point: Be completely clear of what sect is the one going to heaven, and only then start preaching. Because the minutest of info. delivered can effect negatively on that individual. I've made a list of effects that would occur if Islam was preached without clear info. from the side of the person doing dawah.
1. When you are for example from the other 72 sects you are preaching illogical Islam and to that person you would appear as a bad Muslim preaching illogical doctrines. Hence, driving that person AWAY from the whole of the Muslim community.
2. Reverts are especially very sensitive about the issue of dawah, because like them they want everyone else also to become Muslims and change their akhira. But reverts, reverted into a wrong sect will only be preaching wrong things. How much responsibility can you take?. It's better you plunge into the depths of the issue first.
3. If at all you realize after years or even hrs of dawah with a bunch of people that you've preached wrong, How many of them are you going to be able to get hold of to clear everything?
5.When you appear confused in the main area of sects, you project a negative and confusing image of Islam. As though it (Islam) hasn't even made clear what is to be followed, even after sending so many prophets.
6. There are many ulema of different sects doing large scale dawah via lectures etc. Mind you they're not infallible. They might all even me reverting people, but if they're preaching wrong, they're getting people into the wrong sect. Don't judge a sect being right, on the basis of how many people are reverting through their lecturers.
7. Never conclude that the number of any sect being large or small has anything to do with it being right. For all you know the biggest one could be the most wrong one!.We have examples in the history where the majority, turned out to be the kaafir.
8. Allot of the lecturers have many books, dvds etc of their work, that they ask you to refer to know better, before doing dawah, but whats the point if you're going to be knowing all wrong and then preaching all wrong.
9. understanding the delicateness of the effect of the tiniest hadith, is important. because that can make or break the belief in Islam by individual. If you don't know which sect is right there is no point in preaching, because you are most likely to take the person away from Islam with foolish logic and unreasonable beliefs. If Islam is a practical religion. then it should relate to the a non Muslim via logic. and not hadith or quran it's useless for one who doesn't believe in them both. They want logic and psyche more than anything.
If you have the spirit or intention to spread Islam make sure you're spreading the RIGHT Islam over fabricated Islam. Amr bil maruf, nahy anil munkar, are wajib on us; don't misuse them with lack of knowledge and say you're fulfilling your responsibility.
Understand that dawah is more than a fun project, it's a BIG responsibility,and the slightest of misinformation can make or break ones view towards Islam. Have constructive conversations with the Muslims around you, ignoring the issue of sects is a fools way of dealing with religion. It's complicated, and a very lengthy process, but it's also a Muslims responsibility to know the truth, and work hard at gaining knowledge.
Inshallah when you do realize the truth, you will focus not on only on people of other religions, but also Muslims who are in the wrong boat.
May Allah guide us to the right path, and increase our knowledge and fill our hearts with the noor of right information. Ameen.
This is just what I wanted to share as my responsibility. DON'T ignore this issue, it's the one that will send major of the Muslim community to hell!
Allah is with the patient ones.
Syeda Fatima, 20
I've been pondering over the concept of dawah, and realized that not everyone should do it. Especially when you're not aware of Islam as a whole. This is a very delicate topic that I'm touching, but equally important.
When the spirit of doing dawah ignites in your soul, ask yourself if you're 100% sure you're right. We all know that Islam will break into 73 sects and ONLY ONE will go to heaven. Meaning 72 sects of Islam are WRONG and will be going to hell. This is a very big thing.
What is my point?. If you are not aware, there are allot of differences between each sect. You might think 'the quran is the same, I can at least preach that' , You're very much wrong. Because there is a difference in translation and tafseer of quran in different sects. Even though the Quran is same, the translation differs. Now you can just imagine the issue of ahadith, and sunnah etc.
My point: Be completely clear of what sect is the one going to heaven, and only then start preaching. Because the minutest of info. delivered can effect negatively on that individual. I've made a list of effects that would occur if Islam was preached without clear info. from the side of the person doing dawah.
1. When you are for example from the other 72 sects you are preaching illogical Islam and to that person you would appear as a bad Muslim preaching illogical doctrines. Hence, driving that person AWAY from the whole of the Muslim community.
2. Reverts are especially very sensitive about the issue of dawah, because like them they want everyone else also to become Muslims and change their akhira. But reverts, reverted into a wrong sect will only be preaching wrong things. How much responsibility can you take?. It's better you plunge into the depths of the issue first.
3. If at all you realize after years or even hrs of dawah with a bunch of people that you've preached wrong, How many of them are you going to be able to get hold of to clear everything?
5.When you appear confused in the main area of sects, you project a negative and confusing image of Islam. As though it (Islam) hasn't even made clear what is to be followed, even after sending so many prophets.
6. There are many ulema of different sects doing large scale dawah via lectures etc. Mind you they're not infallible. They might all even me reverting people, but if they're preaching wrong, they're getting people into the wrong sect. Don't judge a sect being right, on the basis of how many people are reverting through their lecturers.
7. Never conclude that the number of any sect being large or small has anything to do with it being right. For all you know the biggest one could be the most wrong one!.We have examples in the history where the majority, turned out to be the kaafir.
8. Allot of the lecturers have many books, dvds etc of their work, that they ask you to refer to know better, before doing dawah, but whats the point if you're going to be knowing all wrong and then preaching all wrong.
9. understanding the delicateness of the effect of the tiniest hadith, is important. because that can make or break the belief in Islam by individual. If you don't know which sect is right there is no point in preaching, because you are most likely to take the person away from Islam with foolish logic and unreasonable beliefs. If Islam is a practical religion. then it should relate to the a non Muslim via logic. and not hadith or quran it's useless for one who doesn't believe in them both. They want logic and psyche more than anything.
If you have the spirit or intention to spread Islam make sure you're spreading the RIGHT Islam over fabricated Islam. Amr bil maruf, nahy anil munkar, are wajib on us; don't misuse them with lack of knowledge and say you're fulfilling your responsibility.
Understand that dawah is more than a fun project, it's a BIG responsibility,and the slightest of misinformation can make or break ones view towards Islam. Have constructive conversations with the Muslims around you, ignoring the issue of sects is a fools way of dealing with religion. It's complicated, and a very lengthy process, but it's also a Muslims responsibility to know the truth, and work hard at gaining knowledge.
Inshallah when you do realize the truth, you will focus not on only on people of other religions, but also Muslims who are in the wrong boat.
May Allah guide us to the right path, and increase our knowledge and fill our hearts with the noor of right information. Ameen.
This is just what I wanted to share as my responsibility. DON'T ignore this issue, it's the one that will send major of the Muslim community to hell!
Allah is with the patient ones.
Syeda Fatima, 20
Fatimas life 2.3
Salaam alaikum,
Mehendi has successfully arrived!...So what's the mehendi deal?. I've heard from allot of my Hindu friends that they too have mehendi. Wherein all the girls and the bride have mehendi applied to their hands, it's a celebration with music, and enjoyment etc.
In our place it's pretty different. We have mehendis applied on any day convenient, usually after the manja so that the it's well dark for the main day.
So what do we do?
We have this ceremony where the brides sister, closest in relation, if not blood sister applies mehendi on the little finger of the groom!. But it's not as simple as it sounds, its a whole war that takes place, the groom is supposed to not want to have it put, even though ultimately he is going to! How intelligent is that?!The bride is nowhere on site on this day. And all her sisters wear khada dupattas representing the brides team!.
Anyway, so the scene is like this, both the families of the couple are sitting opposite each other, or standing, or just falling over, in a joking protest to the act, while all the brides side are doing the same. There is a cloth held between the two teams. I fail to understand the purpose of! and the war begins, the brides side try to convince the groom to agree his enslavement to the bride; while the grooms denying it. You see all these people have no other interesting thing to do.
The whole thing, ends with the groom finally giving in to the whole mehendi scene, usually after the interference of the older people, when they get bored. This whole thing takes hours!...
Allot of other incidences happen, squirting water via syringes, spraying party sprays etc. Just for fun sake. You don't have to be a graduate in Islamic studies to notice the violation of Islamic rulings here.
So what violations have occurred, just in case you forgot:
1. Hijab! girls trying to get hold of the hand of a na mahram basically fighting for it!.
2. The application of henna, leading to touching of hands of two na-mahrams.
3. Aunts and uncles take no responsibility of being adult and instead promote this.
4. Allot of the people are without hijab
5. camera men and photographers present.
6. Extra intermingling of na mahrams, mind you all young and spirited getting to see each other and fight, and spray water (in some cases) etc. Also older people too.
This comes to a point I've been meaning to make for quite some time,Talking to your na mahrams unnecessarily is Haraam, period. There is no rebate when that person is closest in cousins, or is your husbands brother (young or old). It's the culture we've creating where the distance between two na-mahrams is ignored, but that doesn't make it right. Just cause you are way older/younger to someone doesn't mean you can chat your way to glory with him/her. This is something that is prevalent in the other religions, because not all religions have marriage permission to cousins like in Islam. For them it's a whole different story. But we have to follow OUR religion NOT theirs.!!
Also, another thing i wanted to share, Sari is not the most hijabi garment to sport especially in a mixed gathering. No matter if you're sleeves are full, and you're wearing a head cover. Sari is an invention by the Indian people for the curvy Indian woman for a reason. Any guesses?, it's insanely flattering on the Indian body type. Not to mention, the stomach and back being revealed.
It's clearly understandable why a young girl should especially avoid it if she intends to be dressed modestly. However, for some unknown and unreasonable reason older women don't consider themselves applicable to hijab in any way. Why? "we're old, no one looks at us". WHO ARE YOU KIDDING?!!.
Testosterone is almost a disease. It's stupid to think, that once you've attained a certain age you're not falling into hijab category (except for really aged women, refer taudhi). Allah didn't create women so that they'd be beautiful only for few years. Marriages would not last otherwise. And which ever woman thinks she's ugly enough to not do hijab should also consider herself ugly enough to cover everything she has init!?
Conclusion: It's all crap!. We've spent too much time fooling ourselves. As women the only way to being satisfied is understanding inner beauty and outer beauty too. When one says their 'niyyah is clean and that's what matters'; let them know that if you're niyyat would be clean, you'd preserve it with outward modesty.
I've also noticed allot of delusional women here. Who act so weird in gatherings that it puts all women to shame. Laughing out loud, bending down like an insane rukuh to pick something, it's almost like a dirty music video where the screen of the TV fills with the ass of the woman. Lets face it, ladies gain insane on their hips especially after kids, to not realize how big you are is another reason why observing hijab feels unnecessary. I've been having crazy ideas of taking pictures and showing these ladies what they look like, just to get a perspective on things. It's unreasonable to say you didn't know, if you don't know these things about yourself, then what else important do you do the whole day?
Humph..So how does it feel to read all this? Does it make sense to you? it should. If it doesn't now then there's something wrong. I ask for some time, again, just to reflect on these issues that we take so lightly. Hijab is not Islam, Islam is more than that, but everything in Islam is connected.
That was mehendi and an insight to a world of delusional living. I'm going to leave you all now with some thinking to do, have to go for a wedding....will let you know about it in the next mail inshallah. May Allah help us understand things through the big picture of His justice, and the day of qayamah.
take care everyone!
Khuda hafiz,
Fatima.
______________________________
written by Syeda
for feed back e-mail:
syeda715@hotmail.com
Mehendi has successfully arrived!...So what's the mehendi deal?. I've heard from allot of my Hindu friends that they too have mehendi. Wherein all the girls and the bride have mehendi applied to their hands, it's a celebration with music, and enjoyment etc.
In our place it's pretty different. We have mehendis applied on any day convenient, usually after the manja so that the it's well dark for the main day.
So what do we do?
We have this ceremony where the brides sister, closest in relation, if not blood sister applies mehendi on the little finger of the groom!. But it's not as simple as it sounds, its a whole war that takes place, the groom is supposed to not want to have it put, even though ultimately he is going to! How intelligent is that?!The bride is nowhere on site on this day. And all her sisters wear khada dupattas representing the brides team!.
Anyway, so the scene is like this, both the families of the couple are sitting opposite each other, or standing, or just falling over, in a joking protest to the act, while all the brides side are doing the same. There is a cloth held between the two teams. I fail to understand the purpose of! and the war begins, the brides side try to convince the groom to agree his enslavement to the bride; while the grooms denying it. You see all these people have no other interesting thing to do.
The whole thing, ends with the groom finally giving in to the whole mehendi scene, usually after the interference of the older people, when they get bored. This whole thing takes hours!...
Allot of other incidences happen, squirting water via syringes, spraying party sprays etc. Just for fun sake. You don't have to be a graduate in Islamic studies to notice the violation of Islamic rulings here.
So what violations have occurred, just in case you forgot:
1. Hijab! girls trying to get hold of the hand of a na mahram basically fighting for it!.
2. The application of henna, leading to touching of hands of two na-mahrams.
3. Aunts and uncles take no responsibility of being adult and instead promote this.
4. Allot of the people are without hijab
5. camera men and photographers present.
6. Extra intermingling of na mahrams, mind you all young and spirited getting to see each other and fight, and spray water (in some cases) etc. Also older people too.
This comes to a point I've been meaning to make for quite some time,Talking to your na mahrams unnecessarily is Haraam, period. There is no rebate when that person is closest in cousins, or is your husbands brother (young or old). It's the culture we've creating where the distance between two na-mahrams is ignored, but that doesn't make it right. Just cause you are way older/younger to someone doesn't mean you can chat your way to glory with him/her. This is something that is prevalent in the other religions, because not all religions have marriage permission to cousins like in Islam. For them it's a whole different story. But we have to follow OUR religion NOT theirs.!!
Also, another thing i wanted to share, Sari is not the most hijabi garment to sport especially in a mixed gathering. No matter if you're sleeves are full, and you're wearing a head cover. Sari is an invention by the Indian people for the curvy Indian woman for a reason. Any guesses?, it's insanely flattering on the Indian body type. Not to mention, the stomach and back being revealed.
It's clearly understandable why a young girl should especially avoid it if she intends to be dressed modestly. However, for some unknown and unreasonable reason older women don't consider themselves applicable to hijab in any way. Why? "we're old, no one looks at us". WHO ARE YOU KIDDING?!!.
Testosterone is almost a disease. It's stupid to think, that once you've attained a certain age you're not falling into hijab category (except for really aged women, refer taudhi). Allah didn't create women so that they'd be beautiful only for few years. Marriages would not last otherwise. And which ever woman thinks she's ugly enough to not do hijab should also consider herself ugly enough to cover everything she has init!?
Conclusion: It's all crap!. We've spent too much time fooling ourselves. As women the only way to being satisfied is understanding inner beauty and outer beauty too. When one says their 'niyyah is clean and that's what matters'; let them know that if you're niyyat would be clean, you'd preserve it with outward modesty.
I've also noticed allot of delusional women here. Who act so weird in gatherings that it puts all women to shame. Laughing out loud, bending down like an insane rukuh to pick something, it's almost like a dirty music video where the screen of the TV fills with the ass of the woman. Lets face it, ladies gain insane on their hips especially after kids, to not realize how big you are is another reason why observing hijab feels unnecessary. I've been having crazy ideas of taking pictures and showing these ladies what they look like, just to get a perspective on things. It's unreasonable to say you didn't know, if you don't know these things about yourself, then what else important do you do the whole day?
Humph..So how does it feel to read all this? Does it make sense to you? it should. If it doesn't now then there's something wrong. I ask for some time, again, just to reflect on these issues that we take so lightly. Hijab is not Islam, Islam is more than that, but everything in Islam is connected.
That was mehendi and an insight to a world of delusional living. I'm going to leave you all now with some thinking to do, have to go for a wedding....will let you know about it in the next mail inshallah. May Allah help us understand things through the big picture of His justice, and the day of qayamah.
take care everyone!
Khuda hafiz,
Fatima.
______________________________
written by Syeda
for feed back e-mail:
syeda715@hotmail.com
Friday, November 6, 2009
Prophet Seth (AS)
Prophet Seth/Shais (as)
Before Prophet Adam died and with Allah's guidance, Prophet Adam appointed Seth to be his successor, making him a prophet.
Seth was Prophet Adam's third son; he was born five years after the death of Habil. Prophet Adam (as) was very sad that Habil was dead. But Allah, in great mercy and kindness, gave Prophet Adam another beloved son. Allah told Prophet Adam (as) that he would have a son and from the descendants of this son would come Prophet Muhammad. This made Prophet Adam very happy. Allah's mercy was so great to Prophet Adam that Allah made Seth look like his father. Prophet Adam loved Seth very much. He taught Seth the hours of the day and night and told Seth of a flood that was to come.
Prophet Seth (peace be upon him) taught his people to believe in Allah and to live in peace with others. Prophet Seth said that mu'mineen, the people who believe in Allah, should:
* First of all know Allah
* Then should know the difference between right and wrong, good and bad
* They should do what their rules asks them to do
* They should know what the mu'mineen must do for their parents and they should take care of their parents
* They should be nice to their relatives
* They should not let their anger get to big and make them do wrong things
* They should give charity to the poor
* They should avoid doing bad things and be patient when they are having a hard time or struggling
* They should always be thankful for Allah's blessings.
Reference:
From Adam to Muhammad by Abdur Rehman Shad
Qissasul Anbiya translated by Badr Azimabadi
http://ourseeds.tripod.com/ProphetSheth.html
Prophet Seth’s (as) wife gave birth to Anush (Enos). Anush's wife gave birth to Qainin (Cainan). And his wife gave birth to Mihlayil (Mahalaleed) and his wife gave birth to Yard (Jared) and his wife gave birth to Khanoekh (Enoch) (Allaahu alim, according to many of the ulema the real name of the Messenger Idris a.s).
It is claimed that all the lines of descent of the children of Adam end at Sheath. All the other sons of Adam except Sheath disappeared.
The word "Sheath" means Allah grace (Rahma). Sheath was so named because he was born as a child of Adam and Hawwa' after Cain (Qabil) had murdered Abel (Habil).
The lesson is obedience to your father. Sheath didn't said "find someone else, I have better things to do"
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081219083904AAqoVCt
We know that Prophet Seth appointed prophet Idris (as) as prophet after him through this ayah from the Quran (Surah Maryam):
“And mention Idris in the Book; surely he was a truthful man, a prophet” (19:56)
Other links:
Book on prophets, ‘Men of God’
http://www.ezsoftech.com/ebooks/menofgod.pdf
Before Prophet Adam died and with Allah's guidance, Prophet Adam appointed Seth to be his successor, making him a prophet.
Seth was Prophet Adam's third son; he was born five years after the death of Habil. Prophet Adam (as) was very sad that Habil was dead. But Allah, in great mercy and kindness, gave Prophet Adam another beloved son. Allah told Prophet Adam (as) that he would have a son and from the descendants of this son would come Prophet Muhammad. This made Prophet Adam very happy. Allah's mercy was so great to Prophet Adam that Allah made Seth look like his father. Prophet Adam loved Seth very much. He taught Seth the hours of the day and night and told Seth of a flood that was to come.
Prophet Seth (peace be upon him) taught his people to believe in Allah and to live in peace with others. Prophet Seth said that mu'mineen, the people who believe in Allah, should:
* First of all know Allah
* Then should know the difference between right and wrong, good and bad
* They should do what their rules asks them to do
* They should know what the mu'mineen must do for their parents and they should take care of their parents
* They should be nice to their relatives
* They should not let their anger get to big and make them do wrong things
* They should give charity to the poor
* They should avoid doing bad things and be patient when they are having a hard time or struggling
* They should always be thankful for Allah's blessings.
Reference:
From Adam to Muhammad by Abdur Rehman Shad
Qissasul Anbiya translated by Badr Azimabadi
http://ourseeds.tripod.com/ProphetSheth.html
Prophet Seth’s (as) wife gave birth to Anush (Enos). Anush's wife gave birth to Qainin (Cainan). And his wife gave birth to Mihlayil (Mahalaleed) and his wife gave birth to Yard (Jared) and his wife gave birth to Khanoekh (Enoch) (Allaahu alim, according to many of the ulema the real name of the Messenger Idris a.s).
It is claimed that all the lines of descent of the children of Adam end at Sheath. All the other sons of Adam except Sheath disappeared.
The word "Sheath" means Allah grace (Rahma). Sheath was so named because he was born as a child of Adam and Hawwa' after Cain (Qabil) had murdered Abel (Habil).
The lesson is obedience to your father. Sheath didn't said "find someone else, I have better things to do"
http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081219083904AAqoVCt
We know that Prophet Seth appointed prophet Idris (as) as prophet after him through this ayah from the Quran (Surah Maryam):
“And mention Idris in the Book; surely he was a truthful man, a prophet” (19:56)
Other links:
Book on prophets, ‘Men of God’
http://www.ezsoftech.com/ebooks/menofgod.pdf
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Fatimas life 2.2
Salaam alaikum,
So it's come down to day 2!
Saanchak....Traditionally saanchak is, from what I've understood; the day where gifts are exchanged from both sides (bride and groom). By gifts i mean the ones that society has made subtly obligatory on everyone. Endless clothes, shoes, jewelery, bags, bangles, furniture etc. followed by having the girl wear nath (A huge nose ring traditionally Indian) and jewelery, this is done by the mother of the groom.
The sad thing about this (other than money wastage) is,
1.most of these things are not even used, especially when the couple is going to settle outside their home country.
2. the couple usually grow out of size to fit into the clothes.
3. clothes go out of style! and shopping becomes a guilt with so much already there!
4. the most important i find, is that if it was a girl who didn't observe hijab when married, plans to start, it's very difficult for her to wear these. And these clothes are mostly expensive wedding wear only. And the pressure from family forcing her to wear them is even more.
pointer:This is something ANY girl who wants to start hijab faces. You have to have a major wardrobe change.
Ironically, as much as society pressures & expects both families to give more and spend more, they are also the first to criticize these things. Why? Because it's all worldly, no one is ever satisfied with anything worldly. And arrogance takes over the best of human beings isn't it?! Haven't we all come across such aunties ;)
This gift exchanging and jahez (dowry) scene, is very painful on allot of families.They don't realize that it's all made up!. If really want to get your daughter something fro her safety etc, ask for mahr! what did prophet Muhammad (as) do in bibi Fatima (as) wedding?.
Not everyone can afford to be giving so much not just to their daughters but also to the son-in-law. All leading to acquirement of loans. Families get drowned in them to get through a wedding especially that of the girls. and if they have more than one daughter! they also get sugar and Blood pressure along with the tension of repayment. The whole concept of marriage being a happy things turns upside down. Girls start to feel like liabilities instead of the rehmat that they are for the family.
This not only affects the middle class or the upper class of the society. The poor are human to aren't they? Why can't they also be excited by the thought of an expensive wedding? and allot of spending and lavishness?!
Point to note: This leads to one of the most disliked things. taking loans, asking for money. 'cos lets face it, we CAN do a wedding without endless clothes being gifted!. They CAN sleep on the floor with just the mattress they don't need a whole bed set!. The groom CAN do without 5 suits!, and endless grooming products! etc.
We have sadly been so exposed to the worldly life and the worldly gains that; to think of living at bare minimum is next to impossible for us. Just take a moment and think, and I suggested this to a couple of my sisters here too, can we live without a certain perfume? or a certain dress? will it take our life away will it beautify our akhirat? Just think. I'm trying to draw the big picture. You can live a happy life without being greedy for the best. It's human nature to want more, it's the way we're build. But use it in the right way, want more? then want more knowledge. Want to get the best? get the best of friends, want to be looking the smartest? look the smartest with Islamic education.
Anyway, coming back to this beautiful night of saanchak.....All the pretty young girls are having their hair open, women have the best clothes, make-up etc on. Even though the men are in a separate hall, there are like before male photographers and video people. And once in a while some testosterone will walk into the hall. I know some of my cousins who would walk in with an excuse just to eye girls!. NO joking!!.
Anyway I take a seat after meeting everyone. I look around and at the young girls and think 'Why are these girls doing this to themselves?, do they not realize how pretty they are, to be showcasing themselves in front of na-mahrams who don't even value their beauty?!. How can they not know those curves they have are actually magical in nature? the long beautiful hair, coloured, streaked, jeweled!. The face all contoured the right way with bronzer, looking like they've walked right out of a pro fashion shoot!. Is it cos they DON'T realize of that, or 'cos they DO!. How will they ever be able to satisfy their husbands at home dressing up like this when they save it up for these occasions for other men?!. Will they make a deliberate effort to wear a sari, or makeup or jewelry for their husbands and children at home?....I look at them like how these women would look at almost naked actresses, they think the same, for me what they're doing is the same....and.....' I was interrupted by my aunt, informing me that dinner was served.
That brings me to another point, money wastage on feeding ones who are capable of eating the best food, in fact overfeeding themselves. Not considering or considering very less the many Muslims hungry all over the world. It makes me sad, and food is wasted....I'm not saying i have never left anything uneaten, but i try my best not to at least.
This particular part has had allot of thoughtfulness, I can't help but share my views as a person who's so new to all this. I stress everyone to try looking at the BIG picture the REAL one. The accountability to Allah, His justice and His importance over society's stupid rules, and invalid expectations.
Join me as we explore the very exciting mehendi in the next part! .....Trust me it's going to be a different kind of fun!......
take care....Have a nice day everyone, do let me know about what you think of my weird experiences and thoughts....Have a nice day...
KH
Fatima
So it's come down to day 2!
Saanchak....Traditionally saanchak is, from what I've understood; the day where gifts are exchanged from both sides (bride and groom). By gifts i mean the ones that society has made subtly obligatory on everyone. Endless clothes, shoes, jewelery, bags, bangles, furniture etc. followed by having the girl wear nath (A huge nose ring traditionally Indian) and jewelery, this is done by the mother of the groom.
The sad thing about this (other than money wastage) is,
1.most of these things are not even used, especially when the couple is going to settle outside their home country.
2. the couple usually grow out of size to fit into the clothes.
3. clothes go out of style! and shopping becomes a guilt with so much already there!
4. the most important i find, is that if it was a girl who didn't observe hijab when married, plans to start, it's very difficult for her to wear these. And these clothes are mostly expensive wedding wear only. And the pressure from family forcing her to wear them is even more.
pointer:This is something ANY girl who wants to start hijab faces. You have to have a major wardrobe change.
Ironically, as much as society pressures & expects both families to give more and spend more, they are also the first to criticize these things. Why? Because it's all worldly, no one is ever satisfied with anything worldly. And arrogance takes over the best of human beings isn't it?! Haven't we all come across such aunties ;)
This gift exchanging and jahez (dowry) scene, is very painful on allot of families.They don't realize that it's all made up!. If really want to get your daughter something fro her safety etc, ask for mahr! what did prophet Muhammad (as) do in bibi Fatima (as) wedding?.
Not everyone can afford to be giving so much not just to their daughters but also to the son-in-law. All leading to acquirement of loans. Families get drowned in them to get through a wedding especially that of the girls. and if they have more than one daughter! they also get sugar and Blood pressure along with the tension of repayment. The whole concept of marriage being a happy things turns upside down. Girls start to feel like liabilities instead of the rehmat that they are for the family.
This not only affects the middle class or the upper class of the society. The poor are human to aren't they? Why can't they also be excited by the thought of an expensive wedding? and allot of spending and lavishness?!
Point to note: This leads to one of the most disliked things. taking loans, asking for money. 'cos lets face it, we CAN do a wedding without endless clothes being gifted!. They CAN sleep on the floor with just the mattress they don't need a whole bed set!. The groom CAN do without 5 suits!, and endless grooming products! etc.
We have sadly been so exposed to the worldly life and the worldly gains that; to think of living at bare minimum is next to impossible for us. Just take a moment and think, and I suggested this to a couple of my sisters here too, can we live without a certain perfume? or a certain dress? will it take our life away will it beautify our akhirat? Just think. I'm trying to draw the big picture. You can live a happy life without being greedy for the best. It's human nature to want more, it's the way we're build. But use it in the right way, want more? then want more knowledge. Want to get the best? get the best of friends, want to be looking the smartest? look the smartest with Islamic education.
Anyway, coming back to this beautiful night of saanchak.....All the pretty young girls are having their hair open, women have the best clothes, make-up etc on. Even though the men are in a separate hall, there are like before male photographers and video people. And once in a while some testosterone will walk into the hall. I know some of my cousins who would walk in with an excuse just to eye girls!. NO joking!!.
Anyway I take a seat after meeting everyone. I look around and at the young girls and think 'Why are these girls doing this to themselves?, do they not realize how pretty they are, to be showcasing themselves in front of na-mahrams who don't even value their beauty?!. How can they not know those curves they have are actually magical in nature? the long beautiful hair, coloured, streaked, jeweled!. The face all contoured the right way with bronzer, looking like they've walked right out of a pro fashion shoot!. Is it cos they DON'T realize of that, or 'cos they DO!. How will they ever be able to satisfy their husbands at home dressing up like this when they save it up for these occasions for other men?!. Will they make a deliberate effort to wear a sari, or makeup or jewelry for their husbands and children at home?....I look at them like how these women would look at almost naked actresses, they think the same, for me what they're doing is the same....and.....' I was interrupted by my aunt, informing me that dinner was served.
That brings me to another point, money wastage on feeding ones who are capable of eating the best food, in fact overfeeding themselves. Not considering or considering very less the many Muslims hungry all over the world. It makes me sad, and food is wasted....I'm not saying i have never left anything uneaten, but i try my best not to at least.
This particular part has had allot of thoughtfulness, I can't help but share my views as a person who's so new to all this. I stress everyone to try looking at the BIG picture the REAL one. The accountability to Allah, His justice and His importance over society's stupid rules, and invalid expectations.
Join me as we explore the very exciting mehendi in the next part! .....Trust me it's going to be a different kind of fun!......
take care....Have a nice day everyone, do let me know about what you think of my weird experiences and thoughts....Have a nice day...
KH
Fatima
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Fatimas Life 2.1
Salaam alaikum,
Yes so my life has been going hectic with all the weddings etc. And also acknowledging all the various "traditions" that have been adopted in these weddings.
I know Islam allows them, you can adopt them, but only to an extent. This is a very confusing matter too. I had a chat with a couple of my new family sisters here, and well, they in the end seemed to be confused with regard to what actually CAN be adopted.
I thought about it myself, I didn't have a polished answer. So I tried to fig out a way I could reach a conclusion.
I decided to go through the procedures of these acts and try deriving conclusions separately. This is strictly based on the kind of wedding we have in my place. (please excuse my sarcasm)
The wedding usually lasts for good 7 days.
day 1. manja. basically the point of a manja ceremony is for the families of both sides to get acquainted with each other. This takes place on different days in both houses. Which in totality would make the wedding for 8days!!
what happens?
A jashn, so that the beginning of this beautiful thing starts with the remembrance of Allah and the prophet and the ahlul bayt.
Traditionally the girl wears a yellow khada dupatta (hyderabadi traditional outfit). Which is usually half sleeved and the girls not wearing any head cover. This is only if the girl doesn't observe hijab. Actually even if she does, she's kinda forced to avoid it, since she's not going to be accounted for any sin this day! ha ha ha!.
I would take full liberty to blame such a bride though, we have to be strong in our iman and practices, religion is the only place you are allowed to rebel. REBEL GIRL REBEL!!
so whats wrong in this scene?
1. most women, are wearing saris, and are basically without hijab, and a video grapher mostly male is present. And since the jashn is read by women, the man gets to hear the voices of many ladies but also the voice of the particular one reciting.
2. Men waste their time on these occasions. they only come for the dinner, and useless talk. Not good. I don't understand how remembering the religion is not important for them before this great start! double standards!
When this manja ceremony is at the grooms place the groom is called into the ladies (mind u ladies are without hijab n most of them couldn't care less) all his brothers, also join him! and well the elder ladies have him wear a garland,feed him sweets, and one after the other the closest of the familys women come and give sadaqah off the groom (usually by holding the money in hand and moving it in circles above his head a couple of times) and kissing yes, kissing the boy on his cheek or head whatever.
this gets me to point:
3.total violation of the segregation of women and men. Getting young boys into the room where young girls are decked up!!! Wake up!!
4. kissing the groom?! just cos you're older doesn't mean rules have changed for you.
5. this makes the people lose clarity of mahram and non-mahrams. again video people present, mind you these videos are viewed by the whole family of the groom and bride after the wedding!!! not to mention the photographs.
these were only some of the thoughts, this was all followed by photography, food, etc. Where somewhere down the line men and women, especially young ones come into contact with each other more than needed.
Parents of these kids don't realize what they're doing by attending such functions. They are making their kids meet, and mingle, yet they try to stop their girls, and they expect nothing haraam to come out of it all.
Come on! grow up. This is the biggest example of not realizing the importance of responsibility and power. the power of freewill. If elders aren't going to realize it, how do they expect their kids to be of the utmost Islamic character?.
This has gotten long! with 6 days still left.. will cont. next time, stay tuned for the next episode......of saanchak!
Yes so my life has been going hectic with all the weddings etc. And also acknowledging all the various "traditions" that have been adopted in these weddings.
I know Islam allows them, you can adopt them, but only to an extent. This is a very confusing matter too. I had a chat with a couple of my new family sisters here, and well, they in the end seemed to be confused with regard to what actually CAN be adopted.
I thought about it myself, I didn't have a polished answer. So I tried to fig out a way I could reach a conclusion.
I decided to go through the procedures of these acts and try deriving conclusions separately. This is strictly based on the kind of wedding we have in my place. (please excuse my sarcasm)
The wedding usually lasts for good 7 days.
day 1. manja. basically the point of a manja ceremony is for the families of both sides to get acquainted with each other. This takes place on different days in both houses. Which in totality would make the wedding for 8days!!
what happens?
A jashn, so that the beginning of this beautiful thing starts with the remembrance of Allah and the prophet and the ahlul bayt.
Traditionally the girl wears a yellow khada dupatta (hyderabadi traditional outfit). Which is usually half sleeved and the girls not wearing any head cover. This is only if the girl doesn't observe hijab. Actually even if she does, she's kinda forced to avoid it, since she's not going to be accounted for any sin this day! ha ha ha!.
I would take full liberty to blame such a bride though, we have to be strong in our iman and practices, religion is the only place you are allowed to rebel. REBEL GIRL REBEL!!
so whats wrong in this scene?
1. most women, are wearing saris, and are basically without hijab, and a video grapher mostly male is present. And since the jashn is read by women, the man gets to hear the voices of many ladies but also the voice of the particular one reciting.
2. Men waste their time on these occasions. they only come for the dinner, and useless talk. Not good. I don't understand how remembering the religion is not important for them before this great start! double standards!
When this manja ceremony is at the grooms place the groom is called into the ladies (mind u ladies are without hijab n most of them couldn't care less) all his brothers, also join him! and well the elder ladies have him wear a garland,feed him sweets, and one after the other the closest of the familys women come and give sadaqah off the groom (usually by holding the money in hand and moving it in circles above his head a couple of times) and kissing yes, kissing the boy on his cheek or head whatever.
this gets me to point:
3.total violation of the segregation of women and men. Getting young boys into the room where young girls are decked up!!! Wake up!!
4. kissing the groom?! just cos you're older doesn't mean rules have changed for you.
5. this makes the people lose clarity of mahram and non-mahrams. again video people present, mind you these videos are viewed by the whole family of the groom and bride after the wedding!!! not to mention the photographs.
these were only some of the thoughts, this was all followed by photography, food, etc. Where somewhere down the line men and women, especially young ones come into contact with each other more than needed.
Parents of these kids don't realize what they're doing by attending such functions. They are making their kids meet, and mingle, yet they try to stop their girls, and they expect nothing haraam to come out of it all.
Come on! grow up. This is the biggest example of not realizing the importance of responsibility and power. the power of freewill. If elders aren't going to realize it, how do they expect their kids to be of the utmost Islamic character?.
This has gotten long! with 6 days still left.. will cont. next time, stay tuned for the next episode......of saanchak!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)